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Utopia News is a form of humorous in-game content modeled after a late-breaking news ticker. The Live Newsfeed can be turned off at the News Agency.

Utopia News LiveEdit

The scrolling ticker at the bottom of the screen displays a number of humorous, randomized messages in the form of late-breaking news. Some messages include a random clone/resident's name or building, rather than a specific profession/building; in the following list these are left blank. Some messages only appear after specific buildings are constructed.

Messages include, but are not limited to (work in progress):


  • _____ complains of startling sensation of being tapped awake after falling asleep at work.

  • _____ files appeal against jaywalking ticket, insists it was some other clone.
  • _____ laments lack of patronage, says the in-house musician is a downer.

  • _____ nearly blinded after staring at twinkling star for too long.
  • _____ proposes motion to label karaoke as a martial art after hearing _____ sing.
  • _____ unanimously voted best building by Utiopia Corp. Chief architect Benjamin Chee given special recognition in the form of a news story with his name in it.
  • According to recent poll, 51% of Utopians are part of the majority.
  • After much demand for a Lonely Hearts Club, the Dating Agency finally opens its doors to Utoptians.
  • All systems functioning as intended at the Utopium Mine, fears of fume exposure unwarranted.
  • Aquarium security stepped up after authorities discover visits from neighborhood Sushi Chef.
  • Archaeologists at the Museum fear that latest dig might leave their careers in ruins.
  • Area man sights Orangutan in the trees near ______.
  • Astro Church encourages masses to give freely to the creators in return for a fruitful afterlife.
  • Astronaut takes blame for gas in the space.
  • Bar goers try highly recommended Pan Galactic Whiskey diet, successfully lose 3 days in the process.
  • Baseballer wins petition to construct Ballpark... currently .. waste of space until the sport gathers more interest...
  • Bibliophiles at Publishing House start book club to promote literacy, .. by reading wine labels.
  • BREAKING NEWS: Art Gallery removes controversial exhibit entitled 'Madonna on the Rocks with a Twist'
  • Chemical plant commences operations: residents appear to love the prospect of a meltdown induced Utopium Leak.
  • Conspiracy Theorists at local Arcade forum postulate that life In utopia could just be one big game.
  • Construction Worker's union laments that working with concrete is getting harder and harder.
  • Construction Yard files complaint for new bridges being held up by red tape.
  • Daily survey shows that every single Utopian is happy with their job.
  • Dance Studio inaugurated by mayor. Poets still unable to distinguish dancer from dance.
  • Dentisr's Office [sic] declares local Wrestler as most valuable customer.
  • Doctors instruct Clones to get a few minutes of sunlight every few minutes for health reasons.
  • Doomsday Clock worries some residents, while other shrug it off as harmless prank.
  • Experts at Animal Shelter baffled by unexpected sizes of specimens created, suspect excess Utopium consumption.
  • Flower Shop expands product line, offers candy and chocolates too.
  • Football season on hold until an opposing team can be found, players download Dice Soccer instead.
  • Forklift operators at construction yard find Utopian's pun culture rather unpalletable.
  • Free cake at the ______ today. Get it while it lasts!
  • Gene Pool's panda mating experiment fails, Veterinarian to take over.
  • Greengrocer position avail at Ninja HQ, ... supplies of fresh fruit required.
  • Gym offers new fitness program, promises better resolution for your body in weeks.
  • History Week: What could have been done to avoid the blackout event?
  • Insider info: Docks construction almost halted by hydrophobic protesters afraid of rocking the boats.
  • JUST IN: Enterprise opens doors to investors, promises high-value returns.
  • JUST IN: Film Studio runs into early conflict between ______and an independently developed video game.
  • JUST IN: Film Studio runs into early trouble over naming conflict between an upcoming post-apocalyptic blockbuster, and an independently developed video game.
  • JUST IN: Greenhouse inaugurated by Mayor- neighboring residents must refrain from throwing stones
  • Later on the News: Does Utopia need a Lonely Hearts Club? Resident _____ shares personal accounts.
  • Local Diner to offer more culinary variety. Utopians still prefer Fast Food.
  • Manuscript containing sole account of human history discovered in Library - suggests planet was destroyed to make room for intergalactic superhighway.
  • Manuscript containing sole account of human history found in library - suggests planet was destroyed to make room for intergalactic highways.
  • Market research reveals that more milk drinkers are turning to powder - Milkmonger concerned, Wizard excited.
  • Neighborhood Watch elects ______ as new leader.
  • New Disco opens its doors to the public. Popular opinion suggests it would look great if attached to Casino.
  • Number of bugs expected decline, after entomologist lab set up inside newly commissioned Apiary.
  • Offshore construction reaches new heights, and depths, with the commissions of Utopia's first Oil Rig.
  • Patrons say local coffee brew tastes like mud - Cafe claims that it was ground the previous day.
  • Pharmacy advises.. to take something for Chronic Kleptomania.
  • Photo Studio under redevelopment, Mayors advised to manually...
  • Pilates program at Spa attracts hundreds of buccaneers due to typo in flyer.
  • Police Station's only toilet stolen, Detectives say they have nothing to go on.
  • Poll: ______ and ______. Do you think they would make a good couple?
  • Poll Results: Utopians have mixed feelings about songs played by Radio Station.
  • PSA: In the event of a blaze, Fire Chief strongly advises against fighting fire with fire.
  • 'Purpose' and 'meaning' concluded as the two least Googled words in Utopia.
  • Rangers curious about pink trees in Park, Utopium enrichment suspected.
  • Reckless clone struck by light in Arrival Center, faces fresh charges.
  • Recreation Center inauguration marred by scandal surrounding apparent recycling or basketball court design.
  • Research Lab offers technology to optimize Heart collection, many upgrade made available.
  • Residents question why Superheroes get paid to sit in Mansion. Lack of Supervillains stated as justification.
  • Residents suggest building more roads in order to keep the town neat and organized.
  • Restaurant feedback study indicates Utopians enjoy having their cake and eating it too.
  • School of Magic begins public demonstrations of Optical Illusions - Utopians volunteer buildings as test subjects.
  • Sheriff warns that bear fights in surrounding forests could be grizzly.
  • Shortage of brains hinders research at Forensic Lab.
  • Soldier in bunker survives accident involving mustard gas and pepper spray, comes out as seasoned veteran.
  • Startling discovery by University mathematicians: without geometry, life would be pointless.
  • Sub par performance recorded at Golf Course. Utopians remain confused as to whether this is a good thing.
  • Sushi Chef experiments with Utopium infused recipes, believes substance has organic properties.
  • Telephone Company to reveals [sic] ability to contact other Utopias, blows spectators away at keynote event.
  • Tonight at 9: The debate rages on - Is the world truly flat? The populace stands divided.
  • Tonight at 11: Golden Hearts. Where do they come from? What do they mean? Is your love better than my love?
  • Town Planners Advisory: Building decor... Spirit requirents key to efficient...
  • Town spirits are high! 50 percent discounts are a reality.
  • Townsfolk concerned about new farmlands, worry about lives devolving into endlessly harvesting crops. Mayor assures public otherwise.
  • Travel Agency claims that there are other towns just like ours, that we could one day travel to, Utopia HQ sceptial as Mothership stays mum.
  • Tree falls in Nursery woods, no sound heard.
  • UTOPIA CORP. SUSPENDS CLOUD SAVING SUPPORT UNTIL STABILITY CAN BE ENSURED. MAYORS ADVISED TO MANUALLY BACKUP THEIR DEVICES REGULARLY.
  • Utopians resent having their motives questioned, when ...
  • Waldo spotted asking ... for directions, according to resident _____.

  • Watchmaker at City Square gets ticked off after argument over production rate.
  • We are not alone! Telephonic experiments show existential proof of other similar towns with the same name.
  • Wedding Planner states eligible bachelors have been cut in half since opening.

The Utopia News Live changes after several updates.

Land and Spirit WatchEdit

At the bottom right of the screen is a yellow Land Watch button with green and red arrows similar to those used in real-world stock market tallies. This button is updated with the current amount of used and available Land. Tap on this button to see your current land level, the price and reward for the next level of purchasable land, and the "Expand" land purchase button. Prices for unlockable land grow with each purchase.

The Spirit Watch works the same as the Land Watch. It counts your current accumulated Spirit - generated by Decor - and shows the Spirit needed for a maximum discount (50.0%). Each level up increases the required Spirit by 3, however you can have a current Spirit level above the level required for 50% discount. This does not increase your discount by more than 50% but will give you a buffer the next time you expand.

The appearance of the Spirit Watch frame is orange with the same arrows as the Land Watch, but with an additional blue arrow facing upwards. It is recommended to keep your Spirit level as close to the maximum Spirit as possible. This way you'll have a higher discounts on your expansion costs, construction times, and arrival times.

The Spirit Watch can be turned on and off at the Funeral Parlor.

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